It isn’t often that we get a man’s perspective on wedding planning unless he is being comically and utterly unept so I’m very pleased to introduce felly Shiny writer and bridegroom-to-be Alistair. Al writes for our technology sites Games Digest and Tech Digest and lives in Edinburgh with his recently qualified doctor fiance Lizzie. They met during their first year of university, five years ago, and plan to marry in May next year. Here Alistair tells us his wedding planning expectations…
"In the past, when I have spoken to couples planning their weddings, nearly every bride-to-be has complained of the groom’s apathy in the planning process. Admittedly, when I proposed to my fiancée, I also hoped that my responsibilities would be limited to a few grunts of agreement and possibly a hair cut at some point."
"Perhaps men just struggle to motivate themselves to get involved with the intensive planning that a wedding demands, but I don’t believe the bride really wants a bloke blundering through and spoiling it all. Certainly my future bride and her family are getting much more involved in the intricate details of the wedding plan and I am often presented with the difficult choices that apparently need my input (usually while I’m trying to stealthily vacate the premises). I don’t see this as a demand for my actual opinion – instead it is a more psychoanalytical process where I have to make the decision the bride-to-be would have made anyway, then at least it looks like a team effort.
We differ most in what we think is important for the day; I am just concerned that everyone – the bride, the family and the guests – has a good time. I like to believe that I’m looking at the big picture. Things like the make of shoes or the colour of the chair sashes will probably sort themselves out in the end. Another good example is how we’re trying to pick a photographer; I want to know what type of camera they’ll have, she’s interested in the style of photo album. Surely a photo album is a photo album is a photo album? Maybe it’s better if I stay out of it after all…"