When I was eleven, I put my cards on the table: "I’m never getting married," I told anyone who’d listen. Was it because my parents had just got divorced? Maybe… Maybe it was because I was never that into frills (okay, maybe for ten minutes when I was five) or maybe it was just that the idea of spending a year or more planning one big day seemed CRAZY. Whatever the reason, I still haven’t changed my mind, even seventeen years and *mumble* boyfriends later…
So I’ve found it a little hard to cope with the sudden interest in marriage from… well, pretty much everyone I know. Last December, my Dad got married for the third time, and it seemed to act as some kind of wedding catalyst. First my oldest school friend got engaged, then my next-oldest school friend, then a friend from university. Spring brought two more engagements: another uni friend and my step-sister.
In summer, another friend from university got married, and in autumn another old school friend did, too. (Hey, why not?!)
And who does everyone want to share their wedding hopes and themes with? Why me, of course. My stepsister has threatened to rope me in to dress shopping, and I know next year will bring a flood of
wedding-related emails, invitations and those dreaded wedding lists (I’ve known you for fifteen years, I love you- have a big plate!)
The amount of wedding-related stuff I’m learning has to have some potential use- maybe I could hire myself out as a professional wedding guest (for people without many friends)…? Maybe it’s the universe’s way of wearing down my resistance to marriage. It might even be working – at the last wedding I attended, I thought it could be nice to have someone to dance the first dance with… but that might just have been my hormones talking.
I’m sure that all this wedding fever isn’t really some kind of conspiracy against the non-marriage minded amongst us- even if it sometimes feels like it! The real reason for all these weddings is that my friends are all in their late twenties- and that’s the typical age to get married, especially if you want kids. I don’t feel twenty seven, more like eleven, so it’s not surprising my views haven’t changed!
But there’s still time for me to embrace commitment, I guess, and the wedding madness shows no signs of stopping: just last week, another university friend got engaged, and an already-married is talking about renewing her vows!
The saddest thing about all these upcoming weddings? Not one person has asked me to be their bridesmaid. At all. Clearly I still transmit those anti-marriage vibes, no matter how hard I try to hide them…