We’ve already addressed the thorny issue of who should buy the bridesmaid’s dresses at a wedding, but this week I’m wondering who you think should get to choose them – the bride or the bridesmaids?
As we’ve been planning our wedding I’ve found that the sentence we’ve heard most often is "It’s your wedding – you should do what you want!" It’s one of the biggest bridal cliches in the book (and most of the time it seems to come with the unspoken condition "…but if you don’t do what I want, I’ll make your life hell"), but nevertheless, it seems to be a maxim that many people subscribe to.
In the case of the bridesmaids’ gowns, though, I’m not so sure it’s the right way to go. Of course, it is your wedding, and you have the right to have things the way you choose, but at the same time, I don’t think there’s much to be gained by forcing your best friends into dresses that they hate, either.
So, who gets to choose the dresses? I’m only having a flower girl, who thankfully isn’t old enough to really care about fashion (she’s told me that as long as she looks "like a princess" she’ll be happy, and funnily enough, that’s pretty much the look I had in mind for her!), so this issue hasn’t come up for me. If it did, I think I’d possibly be inclined to specify the colour and length I wanted the dresses to be, and then allow the individual bridesmaids to choose the styles they wanted. I’ve been to a few weddings lately where the bridesmaids dresses have been different styles (although the same colour, length and material), and I actually think it looks quite nice. Not all dress styles suit every body shape, after all, and I don’t think many women relish the idea of dressing in identical dresses to everyone else.
What do you think? Will you be putting your foot down and insisting that you do the choosing on this issue, or will you leave the final decision up to the bridesmaids themselves?
(p.s. The dress in the picture is by Jim Hjelm Occasions)