Amber McNaught writes….
This time next week, Terry and I will be high above the Atlantic, en route to Florida for what will be the second holiday of our married life (the first, of course, being our honeymoon). While we’re both excited about the holiday itself, neither of us is looking forward to the flight – me because I’m absolutely terrified of flying, Terry because… well, because he’s the one who has to cope with me and my fear of flying.
Flights, then, are the truest test of Terry’s husbandly skills. Taking a holiday with me requires a rare combination of patience, firmness, understanding and the ability to withstand the huge amount of pressure I’ll apply to your hand during takeoff. Yes, I’m surprisingly strong when I’m terrified. So far, I regret to say that it’s not a test Terry has exactly aced.
Flying, you see, is just one more example of how very different Terry and I are. While he doesn’t exactly love it (he maintains that anyone who claims to be totally relaxed during bad turbulence is either lying or is too drunk to care) it’s not quite the white-knuckle ride for him that it is for me. (Well, it is, but only because I’ll be squeezing his hand so tightly). He therefore really doesn’t “get” why I find it all so frightening.
Oh, he says he does – I mean it’s not hard to understand why sitting in a tin can moving at 500mph, high above the earth is a little daunting to say the least – but it’s a purely theoretical knowledge. He just can’t see why I have to be reassured about every little noise the engines make (“What was that noise? Oh my God, we’re going to diiiiieeee!”) and let out small whimpers of fear every time the plane banks a little. His solution, then, is to stick on his headphones, plug into the in-flight movie and try his very best to ignore the nervous breakdown happening in the seat next to him. My solution? Well, thank God for those little miniature bottles of wine you get on planes, is all I can say.
This trip should hopefully be a little easier on both of us, though, because this time we’re flying with my parents. While my dad has almost exactly the same personality as Terry (yeah, I know , I know) my mum is a lot like me. We’re planning to comfort each other, keep an eye on those strange thuds from the engine (why? WHY?) and hit the in-flight bar pretty hard. Terry and my dad, meanwhile, will probably sleep all the way there.
Will our marriage survive its biggest test? Well, if I manage to survive the flight, I’ll let you know.
Amber McNaught is the editor of Shoewawa and also writes for Shiny’s fashion and tech blogs. She’s pretty sure this is the last “Newlyweds” column she’ll ever write because her plane is almost certain to crash…